Journey 46 - Emotional Wounding

4/23: A Journey to reduce and eliminate my tendency to sustain emotional wounds and to act therefore. Last night, I was quite unshamanic in spreading malicious gossip concerning and ex and future coach of ours, followed by a very aggressive response to my wife’s suggestion that I spend this morning picking up our new mattress (raining, so it was off anyway). I told my daughter last night I knew I still had weaknesses in this area, and I decided to confront them this morning. I smudged the room and lit the Sacred Candle after creating a Sacred Space by Rattling in the Powers of the 6 Directions. I began the Journey outside in back, where a Tunnel appeared in the dirt from Crosses in Front (Snake) burrowing up to meet me. His dark, uniform Spirit eyes viewed me as he broke into a Smile. By this time I had been transformed into my Energy Body only, and I could look down to see that I was crippled by a gaping hole in the lower portion, a large funnel narrowing into my body, through which emotional spears could easily enter and hurt me. We went down the Tunnel, lined in Green rings, and came out onto a forested area with beautiful pink/white flower carpets, tall Standing People, and nice fresh air. I stood and waited, hobbled over by my infirmity of Spirit. A large male appeared out of the woods and approached me. One by one, he took me through various aspects of my emotional life through which I had been and still can be wounded. First was my tendency to not completely honor the Female Spirit, even now, by not taking in the full breadth and beauty of the Female view, or by transferring MY views onto THEM to make it appear as if they were theirs, in order to justify myself. I was taken to a group of Feminine Spirits to my right, sitting around in a Circle. I stood before them and explained my behavior patterns. My tendency to view women in too physical a way, which was very strong when I was young, was still there now, albeit in a much reduced way..and still a potential source of occasional wounding caused by bringing back the feelings of the early days. They then lowered me to the ground, on my back, and uttered prayers while sending loads of energy from their fingertips into my Aura, to fix that portion of the entry funnel that was allowing wounding in this area. They sealed off that part of my Aura, allowing a healthy and correct attitude toward all of the Feminine Ways. I was then taken to a group of Children to my left, all screaming uncontrollably for their own way, unrelenting in not allowing others’ views in. My male Guide told me I was STILL like this..even though I wear the veneer of understanding to the outside world, internally I still thought in many ways of my own needs first..and then had the gall to attack others for that same property in their make-up. This area of wounding was sealed by the children gathering around me, as I was instructed to truly put others’ needs first: the Shamanic Way. Next I was taken back to see the teenagers in my high school, just to the right of center of me, who had taunted my outlooks and behaviors and friendships, to be shown that this is the a normal part of the human condition. No amount of wishing can change how we are when young, which brings a vital behavior in the building up of the adult human Spirit. One cannot be wounded by such action when one realizes that the attacker has no real choice..too underdeveloped. The teenage Spirit was healed in my Aura, so that I am able to allow such attacks from anyone with no wounding. I was then taken to a grouping of rich people to my right, who likewise were shown to have no choice in their actions. Collection of wealth was their Sacred Path, and they had to answer for their own Spiritual growth. It was up to me to allow their Paths, not hate them and resent them for it, or to take their lack of caring personally. My Aura was sealed concerning this wounding potential. Finally, I was allowed to view all these groupings of People as Spirit Energy only, and while some had lesser Spirit boldness than others, we were all nonetheless all the same in our bold blue lines of flowing Power. We then all came together and embraced as a unified force of both human and eternal Spirit. I was allowed to feel total Love for each and every one. I then thanked my male Guide, Crosses, and returned to my room to contemplate this amazing visit. What was interesting is that wounding by co-workers and immediate family members was NOT included in the Aura healing. This shows I have already taken control of these aspects of my Spiritual Health, and am dealing with them correctly. I am not surprised, since I feel I have grown to meet these occasional challenges quite well.