Journey 21 - Rains Again Revealed

10/29: A quick Rattle Journey. I asked my Snake Guide, Crosses in Front, to meet me and take me anywhere he thought I should go. We slithered along the forest floor for a short time until we reached a small tree with a hollow at the very bottom. Into the hollow we went. What a sight to behold inside this 4-inch diameter Tree. There was a huge Plain before me, stretching for miles, dotted with Tipis. Up the inside walls of the Tree, reaching hundreds of feet up, flowed paths of Rainbow light. Green and gold Spirit Energy filaments were hanging in the air. I am suddenly sitting with an Elder, who speaks to me. He reveals that even though I was once the Shaman Rains Again, I no longer am, and should not refer to myself as such, as I have been doing (in Prayer I call myself Four Hawks/Rains Again). He said my only Shaman name now was to be Four Hawks. He told me that as Rains Again, I was very powerful. But, before I was ready, I began dabbling with dark Spirit Energies I should not have. This brought very bad times to the Village and my People turned on me. (Aside: this must be why I got such negative feelings during my initial Journeys to this 5-Stone Altar). I therefore lost my Power. This Power loss was (is) also the ultimate source of the inferiority feelings I had as a boy and young man, going way back past the childhood episodes revealed in a recent Journey and recorded earlier in this Journal. My Elder told me that I was doing it right now, and on the correct Path of Truth once again. He told me using the 5-Stone Altar is absolutely fine, as long as I don’t approach/use it as Rains Again. He also told me that the straying I did as Rains Again is why I am not given permission to contact the Spirits of those who have recently passed on. He said my skills are nowhere near what they need to be to handle such tricky affairs yet. For now, I am to continue my explorations of myself and the Spirit Camp to gain knowledge and Power. Maybe someday, he said, you will be strong enough to start dealing with the powerful, tricky and grasping darkness of some of the Astral Beings.

Journey 20 - How to Relax?

10/22: A self-drummed Journey to discover a way to relax when I get home from work. I went back into the woods as before to visit with my Owl Guide (who is Eagle Claw, my Upper World Guide). As I moved through the very dark forest, I could see the green auras of all the Trees glowing nicely before me. Small gold particles were flowing in large and organized swaths, back and forth between them, particles of manna bringing information and healing to one another. My path forward was lit on the ground by small specks of rainbow lights. I got to the Clearing where I have visited several times before. All the gold specks here were floating circularly toward the center of the Clearing. Suddenly I was shape-shifted above the Trees, and as I looked around I could see the green canopy of Tree auras everywhere. Various rainbow paths zig-zagged through the extensive canopy of aura. Suddenly Owl came to sit on my right arm, and then moved directly in front of me. Staring into one of his eyes, I could see myself kneeling at the 5-Stone Altar holding a Crystal. Immediately thereafter, I was in my room, and the following Relaxation Ritual was presented to me. I smudge the room and my Crystal, then pass the Crystal quickly over a lit flame. I then touch each of my Chakras with the Crystal Wand, each time holding it up to my eyes to look for the rainbow within, then sweeping the Crystal 7 times with my Owl/Hawk Feather. At then end of all cleansings, I wash the Crystal under running water to disperse the unwanted energies harmlessly back into the Earth for use in a positive way elsewhere. After this Ritual was presented, I was back above the Trees in the Clearing. I could see little Spirit Power Centers sprinkles throughout the vast landscape. One of the most powerful was right at my Prayer Spot, where a huge vortex of spirit powers pins constantly like a top. I could see Spirit Beings soar into the edges of the vortex to launch themselves outward in a different direction. These Beings come to my Spirit Vortex to regain energy needed for their next task, and to launch themselves into the proper direction without using their own energy. I am honored that my Power Place is so vigorous that other Spirits now use it as well. This means my Shamanic presence is doing good that I don’t even know about. :)

Journey 19 - Emotional Chakra Tunnel Check

10/12: I took my first Journey to my own Chakra tunnels today. I decided after a very emotional evening at hockey last night to check out the status. This was my very first Journey to my own tunnels, and I chose Tunnel 2, just below the navel, to investigate my emotional landscape. I met Crosses in Front, my Snake Guide, at the orange entrance to this tunnel. We had not gone in more than very short distance when suddenly the entire tunnel turned into a black, molasses like sludge, very sticky. A bat-like head with a nasty snarl jumped out at me from the right, and I asked Crosses to take care of it. He ate it. Crosses then asked me to go back to the entrance to the tunnel while he cleared out much of the goop using a two-pronged (yin-yang) probe made of white light. We then went in further. Next to present themselves were a bunch of beings with very spindly arms and legs, with matchstick like heads. They were wobbling around and basically a nuisance versus a threat. I took them to be past emotions, or current emotional attitudes just hobbling around. We then went further and came to a huge dam, with nothing flowing over or through it. We were suddenly on this huge bridge over the damn, with a very steep arc to the bridge itself. We came down to a grassy/tree-spotted knoll on the other side. We then went back to the entrance. I was very nervous at this point, no doubt a result of disturbing this tunnel. So I decided to go back to the dam and get the waters flowing through it again. I did this, and the orange water (fresh and healthy emotions) began pouring again. I made sure these waters reached all the way to the tunnel entrance, and drummed back. Perhaps the stick Beings (my emotional attitudes) will be healthier now, with some fresh “water” to re-hydrate them. I was very grateful to Crosses. When I was back in the room, I noticed my mid section felt VERY stimulated, as I had been doing work there. I took my crystal wand and sucked out all the remaining unwanted emotions that were flooding through the tunnel with the restored flow. I then took the wand and rinsed it with cold water, in order to disperse the negative energies harmlessly back to Mother Earth. I have altered my emotional landscape with this Journey, and hope to keep the healthy flow going. Occasional visits there will help. My next Journey will be to launch from the knoll further upstream, to see if there are any emotional issues there that need to be dealt with that could cause the flow to stop again.

Journey 18 - The Crystal Chamber in My Head

10/10: I undertook a Journey this afternoon in an attempt to find out how I can increase my ability to read Spirit Energy, mainly in People. I just don’t get it, and I asked my Lower World Guide Crosses in Front to take me to a place where I might discover, or better uncover, this ability. I self-drummed after smudging and Shamanic breathing to relax. I met with Crosses in the small Chipmunk hole out back, but we were not there for more than an instant. Immediately I was walking across a field with loose vegetation as Crosses slithered ahead in front of me, leading the way. After a short time, we came to a shoreline..and we both continued walking across the water a great distance out. We came to a very small mound of stones and dirt with a few small plants, and came to a rest there. Water surrounded us completely, and the sky above was almost the same hue and brightness. We sat there for a few seconds and I waited. Suddenly, I found myself shrinking down to ground level..and suddenly I WAS this little island. I felt that sense of permanence and presence that Stone People feel, complete with a detachment from the surrounding water, despite the closeness and immersion therein. I remembered the Water represents the emotions, and both our walk across the water, and now my separation from it by being immoveable and solid and just aware, was a signal to me that to read Spirit Bodies correctly one had to all but drop one’s emotional attachment to the subject, and view it with the awareness of Stone and Dirt and Plant People. As I sat there, a Dragonfly went by and I could see its Spirit Body glistening around it. I asked Crosses if that were all. But no, Crosses then abruptly changed the scene and took me down through my own head into my Brain. We went by some lobes and went in deeper. We came to a small, dark and long unused corridor, with a very rusty door on a wall, upon which was hung a very rusty key. I was told to pick up the key, and as I did it sprang to life and glowed with energy..it had turned to crystal. The door lock had done so as well, and I inserted the key and opened the door. We moved inside, where it was completely black. No light, nothing. We just went further and further in, until I looked behind and saw the doorway was just a speck of very bright light, like a strong star. I turned back to behold a white shaft of light before me. I got the sense this was the white dot on the black field of the yin yang symbol, the symbol of ultimate balance. I stepped into the shaft and was back up on the island again. Wanting to return to learn more, I went back to the doorway in my brain, and it was all crystal by now. I then began to take people I knew into this black room with me. I took Janet, but felt my reading of her colors was generated by my own thinking, not by her actual radiance, so I took her back out. I took in a co-worker for a check, and saw he had quite a few areas of lowered spirit colors. I looked at my own body and saw some lowered energy in the chest and sacral Chakra areas. Since I can only work on my own Spirit Body, not having permission from the others, I fixed my own weak areas by adding energy back to them. Suddenly the black void turned very bright, and I was inside a huge sphere made of millions of crystal facets, all radiating different hues of the rainbow. Two Feathers and Crosses were both there. They told me I could project images of peoples’ robes onto the crystal walls, and view the energy excesses/lacks from there in the shadowy shape it made. I was told I can visit this room at any time to check on Spirit Robes. I pried the door open with my Crystal Wand to keep it from shutting again. I then felt Crosses planting a four-petal Spirit Flower in my head, with the petals inside my skull and the stem base within the Crystal Sphere. It was as if this was to give me the Life Power of the Four Directions at all times. Crosses and I then came back, and I thanked her and drummed back into the room. I felt extremely at peace, knowing the door to increased awareness of Spirit Powers was now open, and I had been taught the state (almost unemotional awareness) and a technique for measuring Spirit Power in people. I knew my Crystal Wand, some of whose energy was now holding the door open, would also play a key role.

Journey 17 - Both Women were Shamans

10/6 I performed my first Rattle-induced Journey this afternoon. As I lay shaking the Rattle directly over my brow, I kept repeating my Native names, asserting that is who I am. Over and over I repeated the names: ”I am Four Hawks..I am Rains Again..” Suddenly, a large white ball of energy appeared before me. The surface was irregular, almost teeming with small filaments, and it was BRIGHT white, almost like the sun. I saw small colored dots and shapes on the otherwise white surface, and it came to me that these were pathways into different universes/lives, and one would choose the color by the lesson needed in that life. As I looked to my left, I saw both my wife and pastor standing next to each other, both looking at me with smiles. I realized that both had been Shamans in prior lives! They have been sent to me to help rein my free-spirit in. I have TWO key helpers here in this life! Based on what I have gathered so far, I somehow had failed my lesson as Rains Again 900 years ago, and have returned now as Four Hawks to try again. These two superb women are here to help guide me. I looked back at the ball, and the Color I chose to come into this life was Purple, the highest of the Spirit colors! I found this Journey, short as it was, incredibly powerful and indelible. All of existence exists as a small white circular mass of pure energy, and one chooses which color-path to enter on one’s way to a new lesson in life. I got the sense that this was a very small ball..and while I did not sense this during my Journey, I am sure there are many more like it.

Journey 16 - Dad's Business Card

10/3 Took a second Journey today to discover what the story is/was with the business card of my Dad’s that Ma found long after his passing. On the back were four account numbers, one for each child, with account numbers and sizeable amounts of money for each. My Mom has had no luck finding the accounts or any other history thereof. Recall I asked via Pendulum if I could discover the Truth thereof, and got a YES. So I self-drummed a second time and called on the Hawk that took the Dove before my Smoke. Riding her back, she took me into the woods and immediately to the Clearing where I had looked into the Crystal while Eagle Claw beat his wings above me, to discover the status of Janet’s job. As we reached a Tree to the side of the Clearing, Eagle Claw was there as Owl. Hawk put me onto the branch next to him after landing, so I was sandwiched between them. We then both shimmied down the Branch to the end, and from there Owl took me instantly down to Boston, where we landed at my Dad’s grave. We then went under! There was a small, gray and dim room with single table. Eagle Claw and I sat for a short time. There was a map of thw work place city on it, but no clues as to where the funds might be..nothing rang out at all. Suddenly my Dad appeared as a young adult. He didn’t speak, but I received the message that the same accountant who ripped $6,000 off my mother in a phony investment scam after my Dad died also ripped off my Dad! He had placed these accounts with this guy..and I also got the impression that Dad learned of the scam just before he died, and was unable to pass the info onto us..or was too embarrassed. In fact, it was learning of the scam that contributed most to his fatal attack. I got the sense that the Dark blob that visited my mother a few years after we left the area was the accountant, coming to say he was sorry. Dad asked me not to tell my mother of this, so I will honor his wishes. I thanked him for the info. Then, to my right at this table, my Dad’s old face appeared, in fact the “official” picture we have of him shortly before he passed. His eye suddenly turned into to very small and bright lights. His face then changed to black, and with its inverted triangular shape and shining eyes and angry smile, it was quite disconcerting. I’m not sure it that was also him, his shadow self, my shadow self as seen by him..or what. Whatever the purpose, I shall hold this image in my heart, until I can figure its meaning. I then drummed my self back to the room. My deepest thanks to Hawk and Eagle Claw and my Dad for all the info on this Journey.

Journey 15 - Spirit Landscape at Local Church

I Journeyed this morning to see what Spirit powers live at a local Church I've been attending, after smudging the room with Sage and Sweet Grass, and a few minutes of Shamanic Breathing. I self-drummed versus using the CD. I went to the lawn outside the building and invited my Lower World Guide Crosses in Front to come with me. But Crosses seemed reluctant, as this was not really a Journey to the Lower World, but to the Spirit presence in this one. While I was beginning the Journey, a scene of a large collection of Tipis flashed before me, as did my visit to the Tree of Life and the image of my Upper World Trainer, Eagle Claw. These passed by very quickly, and I refocused on the task at hand. So Crosses went with me to the far Woodchuck opening by the woods, but we did not gain access through there. We went to the opening by the bush near the building. Again, as I went in, I felt Crosses resisting, so I went in alone. At first it was just dark and claustrophobia-inducing. I asked for another Guide to be with me, and came out. Two Feathers came to me, and we went back into together. This time the tunnel led to a small, well-lit room, with a table. At the table sat a white man, dressed in traditional Christian ceremonial garb. Seated at the table with him were a couple of black, hooded beings, with black faces that spoke of normal facial features but didn’t really have any that were identifiable as such. Two Feathers and I walked around this table looking at the beings. They were motionless, as if frozen in time. It seemed apparent that the dark beings were NOT in harmony with the religious man. We then noticed a large Bible sitting on a stand in the corner of the room, and went over to it. When I got there, I saw the title John 3: 6,7 flash before me. It comes from the part of the Gospel where Jesus is teaching the Pharisee Nicodemus about being born again. I have since excerpted it and print it below:

John 3:

6
Humans can reproduce only human life, but the Holy Spirit gives new life from heaven.

7
So don't be surprised at my statement that you must be born again.

Two Feathers then came over to the stand with me. The room had gotten noticeable darker, as if being lit only by candles versus the appearance of electric light the room first had. As we looked at the Bible, we noticed a large Golden Feather acting as a bookmark toward the back of the Bible. We opened it, and were shown the title Matthew 24: 6,7. It is reproduced below, and comes from the portion of the Gospel where Jesus is speaking of the end times.

Matthew 24:

6
You will hear of wars and reports of wars; see that you are not alarmed, for these things must happen, but it will not yet be the end.
7
Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom; there will be famines and earthquakes from place to place.

Right as we looked at that part of the Bible, it began to disintegrate. It splintered into tiny bits of paper before becoming a single flame of fire hovering over the stand. Shortly thereafter, the Flame disappeared and in its place was a single, large and perfect pink Rose. Flowers.com reports that “pink roses in general represent happiness, gracefulness and gentleness but if you really want to get specific, light pink symbolizes admiration and sympathy while deep pink symbolizes gratitude and appreciation.” It seemed to me that the rose on the Bible stand was in between light and deep.. The Golden Feather was still there. I took both to my Spirit Totems collection, as they were gifts to me from the event. We turned around, and all the figures who were around the table had disappeared.

I then asked if I might see who was living in the Church as Spirits. I found out the Native Spirit in the High School room was guarding his village’s gravesite. Perhaps that is why I saw the numerous Tipis when I first began. I then asked about the ceremonially dressed Spirit in the Sanctuary and was shown that he was a single figure who was from the Norse visits many hundreds of years ago. He apparently had been taken in by the people in the Native village and befriended them. He has never left them since. I then saw another room sitting beneath the building that had several (at least 4) blue Spirit Shapes moving around inside. I could not be sure if these were presently there, perhaps people who have passed but are still involved in the area..or perhaps Spirits from another age.

I then was taken above the grounds of the church and shown that there is a thin layer of blue Spirit Life hugging the grounds of the entire area like a moonlit blanket of snow. I got the sense that there might be a parallel world present at this site, complete with other races and events. This might tie in with the Spirit Shapes in the room mentioned above.

Finally, while still above the site, I saw that a strong and very bright beam of rainbow colored light is pouring down into the pastor’s house. I then saw her come out and go to her deck, and she herself has a Spirit Aura that is a very bright rainbow, as it should be. My final images was of her face elevated in a church that was quite different from the one we have now. This was very large, all wood and very Middle Ages looking, with lots of wood carvings and the like. At first I sensed this meant her Spirit would be present in the current church for years to come. But then I realized this wasn’t our church. Again, I was unable to sense whether this was a past, alternative or future image. It seemed as if it might be the future..

I thanked my Guides and returned.